Saturday, May 29, 2004

If Not A Daisy Cutter

Napalm, a quad-mount cal 50, willie pete, a tactical nuke, anything. The injustice of the homeless crisis is demanding our compassion.

The Cohen Nebula

Doesn't look like it, though...

Friday, May 28, 2004

Help The Homeless

Our Glorious leader, Ron Sims, has magnanimously and graciously ordained a homeless tent city in the leafy shire of Bothell Wa.

I, a hopeless bleeding-heart soft touch and dedicated advocate of those poor victims of capitalist oppression have a humble suggestion to ease their pain and suffering.

Really,is just one daisy cutter too much to ask?


Thursday, May 27, 2004

Note To Andrew Sullivan

If you're going to support a tax on gas I'm going to support a tax on Astroglide.

The reasoning to support either is equally specious.


Wednesday, May 05, 2004

Bonzo Goes Bye-Bye

From Yahoo News:

Leakey: World's Great Apes Running Out of Time
(Reuters) - Mankind's closest animal relatives the Great Apes are facing extinction and need urgent action to ensure their survival, Kenyan environmentalist Richard Leakey said Wednesday. "We are looking at a number of species that are certainly our closest relatives and are deeply threatened," he told reporters. "Crisis is an appropriate word."


So what? Apes are a bunch of evolutionary losers. Compared to 6 billion humans there are maybe a few hundred thousand gorillas and chimps and about 10,000 bonobos. Which is fargin' chump change in the Darwinian sweepstakes. Apes are a bunch of useless banana munchers, so why should I care? Mommy Nature wipes out species by the wholesale boatload. I don't see anyone leaking tears over pliohippus.

Right about now all you nature types are probably whining about how valuable and important apes are.
Well, first off, how valuable and important are species that can't compete? Nature routinely eliminates the losers. If we are to elevate nature to a primary moral principal, then our only ethical position is to stand back and applaud as Magillah and friends bite the dust. Otherwise we'd be interfering with nature, which is a double plus no-no by envirowhacko standards.

Secondly, have any of ya'll nature boys ever been up close and personal with an ape? Apes are smelly, stupid, violent, disgusting animals. I say Good riddance. Would you want one to marry your sister?

If you want to claim that all animals are valuable a priori I have to ask; all animals? Will you give your all to save the anopheles mosquito? The tsetse fly? The ebola virus? How about those cute, cuddly tape worms?
Obviously you're making a value judgement about which animals take precedence. And face it, apes suck.

Cinco De Mayo My Ass

I'll start celebrating Cinco de Mayo when the Mexicans start celebrating the Fourth of July.

What're we supposed to celebrating, anyway? The Mayo clinic?
Mayonaise? Why the farg should I give a sweet rip?

'Sides which, Corona is fargin' peepeee.

Stuff a lime in a fargin' Miller if you want to taste lime in lousy beer, ya yuppie dickwads.


Tuesday, May 04, 2004

Dude, Where's My Distribution?

If there's a Hell, here's hoping Ted Rall spends eternity having to breath Michael Moore's farts.link
(via Drudge)

Sunday, May 02, 2004

Link Me

Come on, you know you want to.

Let's get that Blog Ecosystem rating up.

Standing Head Department

"Arabs Outraged"

Are they ever anything but?

Outrage seems to be their standard response to any and all situations.

let's try a few other possibilities on for size:

"Arabs Slightly Miffed"

"Arabs Annoyed"

"Arabs Displeased, But Reconciled To The Situation"

"Arabs Reasonably Happy With Events"

Doesn't work, does it?


Saturday, May 01, 2004

Micah Wright Is A Lying Liar Who Tells Lies

The excrement has hit the turbine. Read this over at Ace Of Spades, or see elsewhere:


The stinking pusball never saw combat, and lied about everything egregiously, while making a name for himself as an anti-war protester.

Meanwhile, John "Winter Soldier" Kerry is looking for a running mate.

Another stinking pusball leftist loon liar who made his career telling porkies about atrocities.

A match made in Heaven - or somewhere.

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